


Bake-Off Bribe

by Mr_Westing



Category: Archie Comics
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 19:35:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9673004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Westing/pseuds/Mr_Westing
Summary: Cheryl enters a baking contest, but finds her usual strategy for winning won't work with these judges...





	

It was time for the annual Riverdale Girls’ Club cookie-baking contest, open to any female between the ages of fourteen and twenty. Tradition also held that the contest would be judged by the entrants’ _male_ peers—teenage boys.

And that’s why Cheryl decided to enter; she couldn’t pass up an opportunity for an easy win.

The day of the contest arrived, and Cheryl pulled her car into the pavilion where it was being held. Two rows of tables and portable ovens had been set up, divided into stations for each participant. Basic ingredients, such as flour, butter, sugar, and eggs, were to be provided, but contestants were required to bring any additional elements for their cookies. Cheryl carried two bags of imported gourmet candy chips—chocolate and butterscotch—and placed them at her station.

She spotted a group of fellow entrants—Betty Cooper, Sheila Wu, and Toni Topaz—having some friendly banter with each other before the contest began. She decided to go over and gloat.

“Don’t know why you bothered to show up,” said Cheryl. “Because there’s no way any of you stand a chance of winning with me competing.”

“Are you really that confident in your cookie-baking skills?” Toni asked suspiciously.

Cheryl laughed. “Please, these kinds of contests are never actually about skill! They’re about catching the attention of the judges! And so, with a flattering outfit, a coy smile, and a seductive wink, I can persuade them to give me an advantage! And I hate to say it, but none of you can hold a candle to me in that regard.”

The three girls looked at each other and began laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Cheryl fumed.

“Well, you see,” said Sheila, “the organizers for the competition have chosen three impartial judges for this very reason!”

“What do you mean, _impartial_?” Cheryl asked, her eyes narrowing suspiciously.

“Well, for one thing, the first judge is Kevin…”

Cheryl rolled her eyes. “Oh, _that_ type of impartial.”

“Then there’s Jughead,” said Betty.

“Of course,” Cheryl groaned.

“And lastly, there’s Moose,” said Toni.

“Wait, Moose?”

“Midge is on vacation with her family,” Betty explained. “She wasn’t able to compete!”

Cheryl sighed. “Great, so I’m up against gay, ace, and loyal.”

“Right!” Sheila said. “So no amount of flirting could influence them!”

The three laughed and walked to their stations, leaving the frustrated redhead behind. But her devious mind quickly churned out a new plan.

_True, my intended strategy won’t work_ , Cheryl thought, _but everyone has their sweet spot! And being rich can surely help me reach theirs!_

She got out her smartphone and began searching online for appropriate bribes.

 

* * *

 

“Here’s the things you printed out, sis,” said Jason, handing Cheryl an envelope.

“Perfect timing!” Cheryl said. “I just put my cookies in the oven! That gives me half an hour to hand them out to the judges!”

“Oh, so this is just a scheme to make sure you win?”

“Of course! You want to stick around and relish in my victory?”

“As if,” Jason said, turning and walking away. “Just remember, you now owe me for this!”

Cheryl gave a small harrumph of disdain and began scanning the crowd until she spied a tell-tale beanie crown.

“Hey, Jughead!” she said.

“Oh, hey, Cheryl,” Jughead replied. “Ain’t this something? In just a few minutes’ time, I’ll be sampling over two dozen types of cookies! How lucky can a guy get?”

“So, you really like food, huh?”

“Well, _that’s_ the dumbest question I’ve been asked this week!”

“Uh, yeah,” said an unimpressed Cheryl. “Anyway, it just so happens that I have ten vouchers for the all-you-can-eat buffet in the mall plaza!” She produced these from her envelope.

“The Jimmy Buffet?” Jughead said, drooling. “That place is amazing! Smoked ribs… chicken wings… _amazing_ pizza… and these are for me?”

“Of course! Just remember this when you’re sampling those cookies,” Cheryl said with a grin before leaving to find her next mark.

 

* * *

 

She found Kevin lounging in the shade of a tree.

“So… I heard you’d like to attend the Sunnyside ComiCon next month,” Cheryl said.

“Man, I wish,” Kevin said. “But it’s just too expensive.”

“Not for me, it isn’t,” Cheryl said, holding up a ticket. “And so I generously offer this to you.”

Kevin grabbed it. “Wow, really? Thanks!” He hesitated. “Wait… what’s your angle in giving me this?”

“Angle? You think I have an ulterior motive?” Cheryl chuckled. “Please! All I ask for in return is for you to give me a favorable score in this contest!”

“Oh, so that’s it.”

“Hey, no such thing as a free ComiCon!” Cheryl said as she walked away. “I trust you’ll act accordingly.”

 

* * *

 

“Here’s a season pass to every major sporting event in the state, Moose!” Cheryl said, offering the final bribe to the jock.

“Duh… it’s not my birthday!” Moose said. “It’s not anywhere close!”

“This isn’t meant to be a birthday present,” Cheryl said.

“Well, if it’s a Christmas gift, then that’s even _more_ off!”

“It’s not a gift at all, you dolt!” Cheryl snapped. “It’s a bribe! You know, so that you’ll say my cookies are the best!”

“Oh,” said Moose. “Duh… okay!”

 

* * *

 

Cheryl returned to her station just in time to pull her batch out of the oven and set them to cool. She arranged them carefully on a plate to prepare them for judging.

“Before we begin tasting everyone’s cookies,” Kevin announced, “we must state sadly that one of our competitors has been disqualified.”

“Yeah,” said Jughead. “For attempting to bribe the judges, Cheryl Blossom is no longer in the running.”

“What!?” Cheryl roared.

“Duh, yeah!” Moose said, holding the gifts out. “So, uh, thanks, but we can’t accept these. Wait till it’s really our birthdays.”

Cheryl snatched the papers back. “Very well, you ingrates!” she said. “Give someone else first place! See if I care!” And she stormed off.

 

* * *

 

The prizes were given out, and the judges remained behind to help clean up—namely, help by eating the leftovers, including Cheryl’s.

“It’s a shame we had to disqualify her,” Kevin said, munching on a chocolate-butterscotch confection. “Her cookies are delicious!”

“Yeah,” Jughead concurred. “If she hadn’t tried to rig the contest, she might have won!”


End file.
